Marai redux

shashigai has a beginner's drawing book where one of the exercises is to draw objects that you could call your beloved. We were talking about what that would mean if I applied it to my own art.

He asked about Jade Vanderholle, the computer game character I used for my 3D modeling class last year. Was she something that held my love? I made her out of perler beads, even. Would I paint her?

But the thing is, that love is what I put into the painting of Marai from Dekan, and when it was finished, it didn't inspire much interest from anyone outside. Since then, I've been wondering why. She holds things I very much care about. Why didn't that translate into the art?

It was her lover, Bonnus, that she was dreaming of by the fire, wondering if he would ever come home to her. Shashigai said to remember how it felt when he was still living up north. I didn't know when he would come to join me, if ever.

In that case, I said, I'd frame it totally differently.

So I sketched out another try, and since it came out all right, I spent today adding colour. I'm curious whether it gets any closer.